another night of mindless television. Or so I thought. I was on the phone with my Mistress and I was reading the latest 'chapter' in a story She is writing about our Victorian alter egos. It was making me very hot and, well.... needy. My Mistress doesn't like to Dominate me over the phone, and we've never had phone sex. But when She heard me panting and whimpering softly into the phone.... I guess She couldn't resist. She said all of the filthy degrading things that I love to hear and simply cannot come without. I told Her all the ways I'd service Her if I were there. She told me all of the rough ways She would take me (in every orafice). All in all, it served for a delcious distraction from the pain of our seperation for a few fleeting moments.
I love my Mistress. I cannot emphasize this enough. And this amazing poweful woman loves me back. My Mistress had gone outside of Her comfort zone out of love for me... and I intend to return the favor....
I am bisexual. I have come to terms with the fact that there are times (usually very random times) when I find myself attracted to the male form... but the thought of submiting to a man creates a painful tightness in my chest and my stomach feels like it's full of some thing heavy and cold. I am not an idiot. I know that my Mistress and I will attend BDSM functions, and at these fuctions there will be Dominant men. I am also well aware that as Her slave, I am expected to maintain protocal and reflect well on my Mistress. This will require me to address the male Dominates as 'Sir', or 'Master'.... I think I'd rather live off of the wilderness and go two years without SEEING a man then to address one as either. But I will. Not only that, but I will address them as such without hesitation. Because as much as it pains me, I would rather bow down and kiss a man's boot in the middle of a crowded room then embarrass my Mistress. I simply love Her too much to disapoint Her.
At the order of Mistress McKenna, here is the link to Her blog: www.amistressmusing.blogspot.com
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2 comments:
It was fun, very intense.
Anyway, My comfort zone, as well as yours, are going to be constantly expanded in this relationship. That's just fine, and it's simply the way it has to be : )
And yes, your helpless panting and little whimpering sounds... you know how much they turn Me on...
And yes, you damn well had better address all Dominants with the proper respect. I know you won't disappoint Me, Dorian. You know exactly what is required of you.
When you started the "I am bisexual" paragraph, I thought perhaps you were going to say something about strap-ons. I'm certainly pleased you're open-minded about them. More for U/us to explore together.
I love you, my slave.
I have never had a homosexual experience, but like you, I have my feelings and fantasies. What I find common in potentially bisexual male discourse is that they (we) want to be forced to do what is considered homosexual acts. The interesting part is when or if we are truly tested. Will we succumb or resist?
I don't know how much of this is just being submissive, or being submissive to a female. But there is no denying of the bisexual component.
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